PCOS and the dream of a family
“ In 2013, I mentioned to my doctor that my dream for the near future was to start a family. My sister was diagnosed with endometriosis at the time, so there was a high probability that I would have it, too. ”
“Peer support – both in relation to PCOS and infertility – is also a very important tool for coping. Somewhere, there is someone who is going through the same things as I, struggling with the same thoughts and problems.”
In 2013, I mentioned to my doctor that my dream for the near future was to start a family. My sister was diagnosed with endometriosis at the time, so there was a high probability that I would have it too. At the time, I was not diagnosed with endometriosis, but the doctor advised me to wait six months after I stopped using contraception and to contact them if I did not conceive. Six months went by, but there was no sign of pregnancy. For the six months, I had very irregular periods. They did come, even too often. For many women with PCOS, menstruation is infrequent or even non-existent. For the first time in many years, I was not taking birth control pills, and with the pills, my cycle had been regular. From my youth, I remember having a lot of painful periods, but I don’t remember any significant irregularity.
When treatment started, the ultrasound quickly revealed polycystic ovaries. Blood tests also revealed other symptoms typical of PCOS, such as high levels of male hormones. The results meant that I would probably not ovulate at all or would ovulate very rarely. Treatments were started with mild medication to try to induce ovulation. In my case, we needed to start injections for there to be a response. For some reason, a pregnancy still didn’t start, and it was time to move on to the next treatment. We had our first insemination, and luckily for us, a pregnancy started. Our struggle with infertility lasted two years.
When we started hoping for another child, the idea was of course to inseminate. The medication was exactly the same as the last time, but the response was far too strong. Insemination turned into IVF, from which we obtained two transferable embryos. However, both embryo transfers were negative. The next time, two more transferable embryos were obtained, but both were negative again. The next time, the response was very strong, so the quantity was already eating away at the quality of the ovarian follicles. For this reason, we only got one embryo. This embryo was supposed to be transferred to a medicated ovulation induction cycle, but again the response was too strong. If the embryo was transferred, there would have been a risk of quadruplet pregnancy. In this situation, insemination was performed without a release injection, so my body had the choice of where to ovulate. Luckily for us, the pregnancy started, and we are now expecting two little ones.
So, I want to tell you that women with PCOS have a good chance of getting pregnant. The journey may be short or long, but the odds are high that a pregnancy will eventually start. As you can see above, the biggest impact PCOS has had on my life is through infertility. Sometimes, it’s been hard to carry the burden of the infertility being my fault. I make it difficult for us to get pregnant. Sometimes, I even thought that I was depriving my husband of the chance to have children. This has eaten away at my femininity to a considerable extent. I don’t have strong external symptoms such as acne or heavy hair growth. However, I know that many people with PCOS struggle with these additional issues. This is a disease that eats away at womanhood. I do struggle with my weight – all the kilos are holding on tight. However, there were already some problems when I was at a normal weight, before my first pregnancy. So, losing weight is not always a direct route to happiness in this matter. However, a normal, healthy, and varied diet and exercise are key, as they are for many other conditions.
In all things, I find that openness helps me the most, whether the thing is positive or negative. When you get to share things with someone, a part of the weight is lifted off your shoulders. Being able to talk openly about my problems with friends and family has helped me a lot. Peer support – both in relation to my PCOS and infertility – is also a very important coping method. Somewhere, there is someone who is going through the same things as I, struggling with the same thoughts and problems.
Teresa’s name has been changed.
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